Things I learned (or made me laugh) from Ike in incomplete sentances

Weido gets an evacuation notice, not an eviction notice.

$7 Standing room only tickets = front row Crawford Box seats.

Brandon Moss was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Vests are lame.

Puma paws are fun.

Barta is not at weeble. He wobbles, and he does fall down.

Everyone loves Mo's. Except my flip flops.

If I HAVE to, I can support the weight of my drunk brother, but I will take embarrassing pictures of him passed the f..k out with his baby blanket on our parent's couch.

If the power goes out, car radios + iPod + Heights Dr.= dance party.

My parents are far more 'cool' than I could ever hope to be.

Pine trees are STRONG.

Chocolate chip cookies are the only thing anyone wants in an emergency situation. Ever. Period.

Do not climb on the boat.

Do not yell at passing cars; it may be a cop.

Mark Weido can throw a spiral in a hurricane.

There are three kinds of black labs.

Ike is Swedish.

I kick ass at random-ass sports trivia, but don't have the patience to learn the rules to play the game "Life".

Toothpaste is not on everyone's Hurricane Survival Checklist.

Milwaukee = Astros "home" game (?!?!?!?) = goodbye wild card.

Me + My brother will kick your ass in a candle-lit game of Taboo. I take that back, we'll kick your ass in any kind of lit game of taboo. Bitches.

Baby squirrels do not agree with milk. Hypothetically, of course.

Baby squirrels are suicidal.

KPD will not transport you to Harris Co if someone cries about driving downtown in post hurricane conditions.

"Paraphernalia" is the hardest word in the English language to pronounce.

It takes 7 ATMs and heavy guilt trips to gather enough cash to bail loved one out of jail in post hurricane conditions.

I love the term "Post Hurricane Conditions".

I still don't know what a volcano taco is.

Puuuuuuuuuma suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuit!

Short back story... as you all know, I'm a tad fanatical about the Astros, but not as fanatical as the Little Pumas. I befriended them about a few weeks ago at the Astros/Dodgers game.

All but one of the Puma's had other business to attend to, so after MUCH febreezing, my friend Rick and I were more than happy to 'Puma Suit Up' and represent the Big Puma at Saturday's game vs the Cubs.

I'm not going to lie, I was pretty nervous about the whole thing, and I was getting over a pretty nasty stomach virus, but it was so much fun!

I can't even count how many pictures we posed for, and we only made one ankle biter cry. Minutes later, the Chik-fil-a cows scared the snot out of me, so I guess that evens out.

Apparently, the Chicago school system failed to teach the difference between large cats and baby bears, as we confused quite a few Cub fans... but, we're good sports and posed for pics with the Illinois Nazis. (And that concludes today's random Blues Brothers' reference.)

OK, be honest. Does this suit make me look fat? ;)

Dear C&D Scrap Metal,

I DO NOT WANT $2 BILLS!

Thanks (but no thanks),
c

Dear Astros,

Thank you for winning your home opener. I'm so glad I could be there.

Keep it up,

c

Dear TXDOT,

If you are going to close an exit and have us detour, please put up some freakin' street signs. Especially if the street I am looking for is actually the third light after the detour exit, not the second as common sense would have me believe.

Thank you,
c

Back to the drawing board

Jay has informed me that Doogie Howser is gay. I guess I won't be stalking him after all.

So, I'm going to miss the employee holiday party. I'm 75% relieved 25% curious/bummed. But, I think it really is for the better... I don't need to over do it and make an ass of myself in front of the hourlies. Plus, I'm going down to H-Tizz for Jacey's party... so really I'm 95% excited and 5% curious.

Does a Body Good

So, I popped into Kroger on the way home from work tonight and the expiration date on the "milk flavored water" (skim) that I bought is December 1.

Hoh. Lee. Shit!

I haven't even started shopping yet, and that's not a good thing. I always stress myself out about giving "good" gifts that it takes me months to decide on something. Except last year when I was flying 6 days a week and had no time... and this year is going to be kinda hard to shop for my brother because whatever I get him will have to be shipped because he's too important to come spend a weekend with his family. No, I'm not upset, why do you ask?

Speaking of family... I'm really starting to miss Houston. Probably because I just got off the phone with Jay Diddy and just got invited to a party I probably won't be able to attend by Jacey. I never thought I would want to move home so soon, I think it's been 4 years since I've lived in Katy/Houston...? I thought I'd want to go live more exotic places before throwing in the homesick towel. Although, technically one flight attendant year is equivalent to 7 indigenous years. So, there ya go. Wait. I'm thinking of dogs, aren't I? Regardless, it's gotta count for something. All the while I've been thinking about moving home, my parents are thinking about getting out of Dodge. WTF?

I still have a couple of months to decide where I'm going to go next, but now would be a good time start giving input. But, really... I'd love to go be an Astros groupie while I still have my looks... and at my age... the sooner the better. YaknowwhatImsayin?

Leaving Houston

I've been to Houston/Katy twice in the past 30 days (give or take) and it gets harder to leave every time. I'm really sick of being so far away from my friends and family. Of course going to two of the best parties EVER a month apart is probably isn't fair and is escalating the feeling that my life in Dallas is boring and I've become obsessed with work to fill the void. I know it wouldn't be crazy parties surrounded by friends and family every weekend if I moved back, but it wouldn't be laundry and netflix alone every night either. I like my job, but I never thought it would be the most important thing in my life.

I'd rather be surrounded by friends with a mediocre job than bored with a decent one. Ok, maybe I'm being a tad dramatic, I guess I'm also not looking forward to spending Thanksgiving away from my family and then my brother not coming home for Christmas.

The Wedding!

More pictures!

I sooo typed this on Friday...

So, I was supposed to be on a 9:30am flight this morning which would have been fine if I hadn't overslept and woke up at 9am. Somehow, I jumped in the shower, finished packing and was on a flight to Houston at 11:30am. Yeah, I'm that awesome.

I got the full search, swabbed for explosives and pat down by a very nice lady. I guess walking up to to the ticket counter and paying cash for the next available flight will raise a red flag or two.

By two o'clock I was having a beer with Goo and by five o'clock we had hit every shoe store in the mall and I was on my way to the wedding rehearsal.

I am now obsessed with watching people play Bioshock. I think that's the name of it. Under water zombies and heroin. Best. Game. Ever.

Poop. Scoop. Pitch.

This is my new favorite anti-poop campaign. There are signs like this all over Addison and they make me happy.

We took this a couple weeks ago during Shakespeare in the Park, where I was so busy working that it took me two days to realize that we weren't watching Othello.

Today was a long day at work, trying to wrap everything up so I can get on a plane at 9am to go to Houston to be a groomsmaid for my homeslice Jay Diddy! Wooo! I'm packed and ready to go... I think I'm going to have to leave my dress in Katy because it's the only thing that will fit in my bag and I don't want to mess with carrying it separately in it's own 'garment bag' thing on planes.

I'm flying back on SWA, which I am not looking forward to. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: Southwest = Greyhound with wings.

If you're in Houston/Katy and you want to see me... too bad, I'm booked. Just kidding... I may have some time late Friday night or Saturday afternoon. Call me.

Day LUUUUUUUBY'S!!

Oh jebus. I just stopped up the toilet and called maintenance and Gaby used her evacuation training to block the exit so I couldn't leave her alone to take the blame, she crossed her arms and yelled "This exit blocked! Turn around, go the other way!" I finally gave up, but by the time the guy finally shows up, we've got the damned giggles (you know how I do) so bad that we're both trying to blame the obstruction on the other, but are laughing and crying so hard that we can't get it out. Then it took the guy quite a while to remedy the problem which set us to giggling even harder.

Anyway... today was a good day. Everyone wished me lots of luck before the retake and was really sweet. Everyone passed! And everyone passed the new test today, also! Yea, us!

Today was emergency/abnormal situations, which basically meant we watched a bunch of nasty/depressing videos/news clips about plane crashes. Not the feel good lesson of the week. Tomorrow is hijacking which should be just as uplifting. The good news is that tomorrow is Positive Check-In... which means we need our pumps, passports, watches, company ID, manual, and flashlight. Wait, that's not the good news, the good news was that none of us had half of those things so after class, six of us jumped in Gaby's Explorer and took a "field trip" to Kohl's, Target, Payless, Famous Footwear, Deerbrook Mall, then Wal-Mart. We had entirely too much fun and probably received a few odd looks or comments, but we didn't even notice. I think we all needed to let loose and be silly.

People kept asking "Who are you with?" We had fun answering this one, too. We had the waiter at LUBYS!! (I've been deprived for almost 2 years) convinced that we were a professional co-ed soccer team called the Pythons from Des Moines (they're still making fun of me for having to fly there) and were in the World Championship Tournament at the Astrodome this weekend, and he should come root us on if he didn't have to work. There was a balloon animal "artist" there and the waiter had him make me a soccer ball. Too fun.

Now it's back to homework and studying.

Hugs and kisses,
-c