So, I totally neglected my blog and the ridiculous idea that I would blog everyday seems so... well, ridiculous. What ends up happening is I post youtube videos and lame three sentence blogs. That wasn't the idea at all.
I'm only 3 posts away from catching up, so at this point, I'll just fake three more and hope that I can keep up from here on out. Because, honestly, if it gets away from me again, I'm going to let it. (Wow, there are way too many commas in that sentence. Damn you, alcohols!)
Anyway, I think it's better to make decent posts at irregular intervals than to post shit every day just for the sake of posting. Ya know... quality over quantity.
Showing posts with label lame. Show all posts
Showing posts with label lame. Show all posts
Monday, January 12, 2009
Friday, January 9, 2009
Reading Update
Of all the resolutions I made, reading more is definitely the one I've had the most success with. I've already finished two books since the year started! Ok, I was halfway through the first one when the year started, but it counts. The second book, as mentioned earlier, is called "I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell". I didn't know anything about it, I just saw it on the shelf at Half Priced Books and thought the title was funny. The back cover told me this:
I think I'm purchasing a witty novel about drunken exploits. I actually purchased a blog. It's just a collection of short stories lifted directly from his website (he never used the term blog, he's clearly too pretentious to consider himself a blogger). So, I'm even more upset that I paid $5 for this piece of shit I could have read online for free.
It's almost as though he read "A Confederacy of Dunces" and thought to himself, "This Ignatius Reilly guy is onto something with the constant verbal abuse to people he feels are intellectually inferior, I should do that." Except, of course, he does it wrong.
I read the whole book, it's an easy read if you get over the tediousness, mostly because I kept thinking there would be some change towards the end. That he would realize he wasn't God's gift to the world and show some shred of humanity. He doesn't. He continues to talk about himself in the third person, name events and grading scales after himself, and go out of his way to be the most vile piece of shit he can. If he weren't so full of himself (he constantly tells the reader how awesome and intelligent he is) and his exploits came accidentally, it might have been a decent read. In all fairness, he did warn me in the first sentence that he's an asshole. I think this is the only time he's ever been modest.
They're making the "book" into a movie. Sigh....
My name is Tucker Max, and I am an asshole. I get excessively drunk at inappropriate times, disregard social norms, indulge every whim, ignore the consequences of my actions, mock idiots and posers, sleep with more women than is safe or reasonable, and just generally act like a raging dickhead. But, I do contribute to humanity in one very important way: I share my adventures with the world.
I think I'm purchasing a witty novel about drunken exploits. I actually purchased a blog. It's just a collection of short stories lifted directly from his website (he never used the term blog, he's clearly too pretentious to consider himself a blogger). So, I'm even more upset that I paid $5 for this piece of shit I could have read online for free.
It's almost as though he read "A Confederacy of Dunces" and thought to himself, "This Ignatius Reilly guy is onto something with the constant verbal abuse to people he feels are intellectually inferior, I should do that." Except, of course, he does it wrong.
I read the whole book, it's an easy read if you get over the tediousness, mostly because I kept thinking there would be some change towards the end. That he would realize he wasn't God's gift to the world and show some shred of humanity. He doesn't. He continues to talk about himself in the third person, name events and grading scales after himself, and go out of his way to be the most vile piece of shit he can. If he weren't so full of himself (he constantly tells the reader how awesome and intelligent he is) and his exploits came accidentally, it might have been a decent read. In all fairness, he did warn me in the first sentence that he's an asshole. I think this is the only time he's ever been modest.
They're making the "book" into a movie. Sigh....
Monday, December 29, 2008
Oh, NaBloPoMo....
January's theme is "change"? Really? That's the best you can come up with? That's soooo cliche.
In case you were wondering (because I've been majorly slacking), November didn't have a theme so December's was "thanks". Who wants to bet that February's theme is "love"?
Well, I guess I could actually complete a month of blogging (sans cheating) for a change. Maybe that's what they meant.
Maybe I'm just cranky because I'm sick. Really sick. I'm exhausted and sore and my sinus cavities are full and slightly painful. It's making me dumb and distractible. I spent over an hour at the HEB wandering around trying to remember what I went there to buy. And I left the house without my cell phone or wallet, luckily I had cash in my pocket.
The good news: the boogers are more yellow than green and my temperature, while slightly higher than 'normal', isn't technically a fever so I don't think it's anything that requires antibiotics.
I just used my favorite kitchen appliance to make the "Get Better NOW Smoothie" to end all "Get Better NOW Smoothies". Green tea, Acai Berry, Emergn-c, frozen strawberries, blueberries, raspberries, dewberries (they call them something else), apple juice, and half a banana. I figure a couple of those a day and I'll be fine in no time.
In case you were wondering (because I've been majorly slacking), November didn't have a theme so December's was "thanks". Who wants to bet that February's theme is "love"?
Well, I guess I could actually complete a month of blogging (sans cheating) for a change. Maybe that's what they meant.
Maybe I'm just cranky because I'm sick. Really sick. I'm exhausted and sore and my sinus cavities are full and slightly painful. It's making me dumb and distractible. I spent over an hour at the HEB wandering around trying to remember what I went there to buy. And I left the house without my cell phone or wallet, luckily I had cash in my pocket.
The good news: the boogers are more yellow than green and my temperature, while slightly higher than 'normal', isn't technically a fever so I don't think it's anything that requires antibiotics.
I just used my favorite kitchen appliance to make the "Get Better NOW Smoothie" to end all "Get Better NOW Smoothies". Green tea, Acai Berry, Emergn-c, frozen strawberries, blueberries, raspberries, dewberries (they call them something else), apple juice, and half a banana. I figure a couple of those a day and I'll be fine in no time.
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
One Step Forward, Two Steps Back
So, yesterday was set to be Otis Appreciation Day. We had big plans, Otis and I. We were to get a driver's license, registration, oil change, brake light, new cd player, and find someone to help me put the bed cover back on. If he was good, I was going to surprise him with a bath!
This is what actually occurred:
After a little legal problem I had, I was under the impression that I needed to pay a fine to have my license reinstated. So, I head to the good ol' VFDub in the OKT. I waited in line, was told I could not be helped there, given a phone number. Called phone number, told I was clear (yea!) and needed to go talk to DPS. Back to DPS, waited in line, received number, tried to read, distracted by loud blonde girl behind me on phone with her BFF ("Oh my god! Her facebook status has been all about Matt for a week!"), finally my number is called. Yes!
Oh, but the waiting doesn't end there. You're only sent to another room to wait. I finally speak with a nice lady that informs me that there's nothing she can do to help me, because I don't actually need to do anything until my license expired in 2010. What a waste of two hours!
It's getting close to five, I either have time to go to the bank or haul ass down to Bear Creek to get registration. I opt for the bank and post office. As I'm leaving the post office, I hit a major traffic jam in Historic Downtown Katy. Seriously. I turn around in a bank parking lot, and a nice old man in a pick-up truck calls out to me (I can hear him because I haven't bought a cd player yet) that my left brake light is out.
I reach for the two shiney bulbs in their package on my dashboard and hold them out the window to him. "I'm working on it! Haha! Thank you!" Since I'm already in the OKT, I head over to the parentals to borrow a screwdriver to change my lightbulb. I've been promised it's easy.
Of course not. After fighting with the last screw for 10 minutes, I shuffle into the house. "Daddy?" He finally gets the screw off and the damn thing still won't work! We test the bulb in the working socket, it's not the bulb that's out. BOO!
So, I head over to O-O-O-O'Reily's Auto Parts! I've stumped them. If it were the switch, both brake lights would be out. If it were a fuse, all the lights would be out. Must be wiring. Go to a mechanic. Oy.
So, on to the oil change. I'm starting to feel a little down. I've accomplished nothing. I have a gift card to Wal-Mart, so I turn Otis in their direction for an oiling. I arrive at 5:40, they don't close until 7pm. Fantastic! I turn my baby over to an old man who in turn hands me a 'pager'. "It'll light up and buzz like when you're waiting at the fancy rest-a-ronts. It's got a clip on there for your pants. Careful, though, there. It moves around alot." I fight the urge to shove it down the front of my pants for a cheap laugh and place it in my purse.
I've had just about enough roaming when the damn pager goes off and scares the piss out of me. I head back to Lube & Tire where I'm informed that there's a problem with my hood. They broke it! After the oil change service, the hood stuck about an inch or so up. They couldn't get it to completely close or reopen. I try. They're not doing it wrong (it's an older model, sometimes people have trouble), it's just stuck. The next 45 minutes I watch in frustration and horror as they bang, jump, and stick random tools in my truck.
They try to blame this on me. "If you don't open the hood often, it'll stuck." I don't think so, buddy. I've opened that hood numerous times in the past few weeks to change headlights, tires, and check the oil. And you just opened it to change the oil. F..ker.
The manager finally arrives just as they dismantle the damn latch. I tell him I'd like the service order to reflect that the hood was operational upon arrival, and was not upon depature. He agrees and says if I have any problems they will pay for a mechanic to fix it.
This is not what the service order says. It says, "Hood broken on arrival." LIES! After six revisions, I am finally handed a service order that I am happy with. Then pay full price for an oil change that took 2 hours with no vehicles in front of mine. I even had to clean their dirty oil hand prints off of my hood myself. Lame.
At this point, it's too late to call around to find someone to help me with the bed cover. I admit defeat and head to Mills in search of black dress pants. Steve & Barrys is going out of business again, and I found a pair that didn't make my huge ass look so huge for only $4.83!
So, Otis Appreciation Day was a complete disaster. It turned out to be Otis Abuse Day. So, I'm trying again. After a quick proof read, I'll chug the last of my coffee (and fight the urge to right a cheesy poem about it), jump in the shower and go to Bear Creek to register Otis and my dad's Explorer. Then a new CD player for our journey to Denver tomorrow. (I dropped the faceplate in a cup of coffee a while back.) Wish Otis and I luck!
This is what actually occurred:
After a little legal problem I had, I was under the impression that I needed to pay a fine to have my license reinstated. So, I head to the good ol' VFDub in the OKT. I waited in line, was told I could not be helped there, given a phone number. Called phone number, told I was clear (yea!) and needed to go talk to DPS. Back to DPS, waited in line, received number, tried to read, distracted by loud blonde girl behind me on phone with her BFF ("Oh my god! Her facebook status has been all about Matt for a week!"), finally my number is called. Yes!
Oh, but the waiting doesn't end there. You're only sent to another room to wait. I finally speak with a nice lady that informs me that there's nothing she can do to help me, because I don't actually need to do anything until my license expired in 2010. What a waste of two hours!
It's getting close to five, I either have time to go to the bank or haul ass down to Bear Creek to get registration. I opt for the bank and post office. As I'm leaving the post office, I hit a major traffic jam in Historic Downtown Katy. Seriously. I turn around in a bank parking lot, and a nice old man in a pick-up truck calls out to me (I can hear him because I haven't bought a cd player yet) that my left brake light is out.
I reach for the two shiney bulbs in their package on my dashboard and hold them out the window to him. "I'm working on it! Haha! Thank you!" Since I'm already in the OKT, I head over to the parentals to borrow a screwdriver to change my lightbulb. I've been promised it's easy.
Of course not. After fighting with the last screw for 10 minutes, I shuffle into the house. "Daddy?" He finally gets the screw off and the damn thing still won't work! We test the bulb in the working socket, it's not the bulb that's out. BOO!
So, I head over to O-O-O-O'Reily's Auto Parts! I've stumped them. If it were the switch, both brake lights would be out. If it were a fuse, all the lights would be out. Must be wiring. Go to a mechanic. Oy.
So, on to the oil change. I'm starting to feel a little down. I've accomplished nothing. I have a gift card to Wal-Mart, so I turn Otis in their direction for an oiling. I arrive at 5:40, they don't close until 7pm. Fantastic! I turn my baby over to an old man who in turn hands me a 'pager'. "It'll light up and buzz like when you're waiting at the fancy rest-a-ronts. It's got a clip on there for your pants. Careful, though, there. It moves around alot." I fight the urge to shove it down the front of my pants for a cheap laugh and place it in my purse.
I've had just about enough roaming when the damn pager goes off and scares the piss out of me. I head back to Lube & Tire where I'm informed that there's a problem with my hood. They broke it! After the oil change service, the hood stuck about an inch or so up. They couldn't get it to completely close or reopen. I try. They're not doing it wrong (it's an older model, sometimes people have trouble), it's just stuck. The next 45 minutes I watch in frustration and horror as they bang, jump, and stick random tools in my truck.
They try to blame this on me. "If you don't open the hood often, it'll stuck." I don't think so, buddy. I've opened that hood numerous times in the past few weeks to change headlights, tires, and check the oil. And you just opened it to change the oil. F..ker.
The manager finally arrives just as they dismantle the damn latch. I tell him I'd like the service order to reflect that the hood was operational upon arrival, and was not upon depature. He agrees and says if I have any problems they will pay for a mechanic to fix it.
This is not what the service order says. It says, "Hood broken on arrival." LIES! After six revisions, I am finally handed a service order that I am happy with. Then pay full price for an oil change that took 2 hours with no vehicles in front of mine. I even had to clean their dirty oil hand prints off of my hood myself. Lame.
At this point, it's too late to call around to find someone to help me with the bed cover. I admit defeat and head to Mills in search of black dress pants. Steve & Barrys is going out of business again, and I found a pair that didn't make my huge ass look so huge for only $4.83!
So, Otis Appreciation Day was a complete disaster. It turned out to be Otis Abuse Day. So, I'm trying again. After a quick proof read, I'll chug the last of my coffee (and fight the urge to right a cheesy poem about it), jump in the shower and go to Bear Creek to register Otis and my dad's Explorer. Then a new CD player for our journey to Denver tomorrow. (I dropped the faceplate in a cup of coffee a while back.) Wish Otis and I luck!
Saturday, November 8, 2008
Oh, good. It's going to be one of those days.
1: Thank you for calling Comcast technical support, this is Whatever, how can I assist you today?
Me: Yes, ma'am. I'm calling from a restaurant, and our internet service is down.
1: Phone number?
Me: blah blah.
1: Oh, I can't help you in this department, I'll transfer you to business accounts.
Me: Thank you.
1: Thank you again for calling Comcast Technical support, I hope you have a great day, but first is there anything I can assist you with before I transfer you?
Me: (pause) No, ma'am. Thank you.
Hold music... four minutes twenty seconds.
2: Thank you for calling Comcast technical support, this is Whatever, how can I assist you today?
Me: Yes, sir, I'm calling from Restaurant and our internet service is down. I cannot batch yesterday's credit cards.
2: Is this a residential call?
Me: What? No.
2: Phone number associated with the account?
Me: blah blah
2: I don't have any record of your account.
Me: Really? The first lady pulled it up with the phone number.
2: Number again?
Me: blaaaah
2: Are you sure you have an account with Comcast? I don't have any record of your account?
Me: Yes, we had a service call yesterday and received a new router. I'm holding the invoice. Would you like our account number?
2: Is this a residential account?
Me: No! I'm still at Restaurant.
2: Hold please.
Hold music three minutes, twelve seconds.
Recorded voice: We cannot complete your call. Please hang up and try again later.
WHAT the hell, Comcast?!?!?
I'm highjacking RR's wireless. Hope they don't mind....
Me: Yes, ma'am. I'm calling from a restaurant, and our internet service is down.
1: Phone number?
Me: blah blah.
1: Oh, I can't help you in this department, I'll transfer you to business accounts.
Me: Thank you.
1: Thank you again for calling Comcast Technical support, I hope you have a great day, but first is there anything I can assist you with before I transfer you?
Me: (pause) No, ma'am. Thank you.
Hold music... four minutes twenty seconds.
2: Thank you for calling Comcast technical support, this is Whatever, how can I assist you today?
Me: Yes, sir, I'm calling from Restaurant and our internet service is down. I cannot batch yesterday's credit cards.
2: Is this a residential call?
Me: What? No.
2: Phone number associated with the account?
Me: blah blah
2: I don't have any record of your account.
Me: Really? The first lady pulled it up with the phone number.
2: Number again?
Me: blaaaah
2: Are you sure you have an account with Comcast? I don't have any record of your account?
Me: Yes, we had a service call yesterday and received a new router. I'm holding the invoice. Would you like our account number?
2: Is this a residential account?
Me: No! I'm still at Restaurant.
2: Hold please.
Hold music three minutes, twelve seconds.
Recorded voice: We cannot complete your call. Please hang up and try again later.
WHAT the hell, Comcast?!?!?
I'm highjacking RR's wireless. Hope they don't mind....
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Cable?
I don't pay that much a month for my basic cable service, but I find that I rarely watch anything on cable... especially since Netflix added a thousand new instant viewing titles.... I'm thinking about just cancelling it.
Oh this post is so lame.
Oh this post is so lame.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Day Off.
My plans for today included running some errands and getting some stuff done around the house. I accomplished none of those things. I can make excuses that I'm tired, but that's lame. I can make excuses that I spent over three hours on the phone with friends and family, but that's lame. I did do some research on my new adventure... so I guess it wasn't a complete wasted day.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
That just happened!
A table just led the restaurant in an impromptu sing-a-long to the theme song from the Jeffersons.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Dear Nablopomo,
What the hell?
I don't know if I'm down with this. I did find a website that allows you to record a message and it automatically posts it to your blog. Think of how much time I'll save by not spell-checking! But, I tend to ramble... I don't know.
I guess I could write in the voice of someone else... I don't know... I may just stick to the Blog365 and post whatever the hell I feel like.
Lame.
-c
See post on the 18th for my voicepost test. Seems I somehow skipped that day, so I postdated it.
The theme for May is going to be VOICES. I think you can approach this in a few
different ways -- you can try writing in the voice or someone or something else;
you could invite other voices into your blog by interviewing people or, heck,
channelling them; or you could try your hand at podcasting, since we've always
wondered what your voice sounds like!
I don't know if I'm down with this. I did find a website that allows you to record a message and it automatically posts it to your blog. Think of how much time I'll save by not spell-checking! But, I tend to ramble... I don't know.
I guess I could write in the voice of someone else... I don't know... I may just stick to the Blog365 and post whatever the hell I feel like.
Lame.
-c
See post on the 18th for my voicepost test. Seems I somehow skipped that day, so I postdated it.
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
Dear Absolut,
You need to work on your apology skills. Seriously.
The ad:
I love that they state that they received "several comments". That should read "several thousand comments".
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Dear Physicans Formula,
What the hell? Did you discontinue my mascara? Why would you do this to me? I feel cheated! I've looked at every drug, grocery, beauty, and mass merchandising store I've stepped foot into in the last I don't know, two/three months and do not see your F.L.A.T. mascara on the shelves. (Fabulously Long And Thick) (That's what she said)
I finally broke down and purchased your Mineral Wear™ Talc-Free Mineral Mascara... It's pretty damn good, but not as good as the F.L.A.T. Plus, I don't get to make silly jokes to myself about the name of it... other than how lame the name is. And it's slightly more expensive.
I checked your website, and you still list the F.L.A.T. mascara as one of the products you offer... yet I have not been able to find it in Houston, Katy, the Woodlands/Spring, Dallas, Denver, or Aurora. I'm outraged! OUTRAGED!
Thanks,
c
p.s. If anyone sees F.L.A.T let me know. I'll reimburse you. And buy one for yourself, it's amazing.
I finally broke down and purchased your Mineral Wear™ Talc-Free Mineral Mascara... It's pretty damn good, but not as good as the F.L.A.T. Plus, I don't get to make silly jokes to myself about the name of it... other than how lame the name is. And it's slightly more expensive.
I checked your website, and you still list the F.L.A.T. mascara as one of the products you offer... yet I have not been able to find it in Houston, Katy, the Woodlands/Spring, Dallas, Denver, or Aurora. I'm outraged! OUTRAGED!
Thanks,
c
p.s. If anyone sees F.L.A.T let me know. I'll reimburse you. And buy one for yourself, it's amazing.
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Thursday, April 10, 2008
Dear You,
Yeah. YOU. What the hell?!? I've been blogging my ass off for months and you either haven't been reading or you don't love me enough to throw a random comment at me every now and then. I even have it set up so that you can comment with out having to register for anything. Because I care.
Some of you told me you didn't comment because I didn't directly invite you to the blog and you felt odd about it. I've got a link to this public blog on every other site I use! Because I want you to read it and tell me how much you love me! So, knock it off and start commenting or I'll stop posting again and you'll harass me about how long it's been since I've updated my blog (I'm looking at you, RhoJo).
Some of you told me you didn't comment because I didn't directly invite you to the blog and you felt odd about it. I've got a link to this public blog on every other site I use! Because I want you to read it and tell me how much you love me! So, knock it off and start commenting or I'll stop posting again and you'll harass me about how long it's been since I've updated my blog (I'm looking at you, RhoJo).
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
Dear Rhondy,
Why don't you enable google talk? I get so excited to see that you're online, but then I see the little red circle that tells me you mustn't be disturbed. Can you not 'rock me like a hurricane' and chat with me at the same time? Do you even realize that you have made yourself unavailable? Don't you know that I have a sad, boring life and need you to entertain me?
I demand answers.
Thank you,
c
I demand answers.
Thank you,
c
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
Dear social-networking wanna-be prankster friends,
Really?
Do you really think anyone is going to believe that you are pregnant, moving, etc on April Fool's Day? I'm insulted by your lameness. This is your warning, next year if you pull that shit I'm calling you out.
Peace out,
c
Do you really think anyone is going to believe that you are pregnant, moving, etc on April Fool's Day? I'm insulted by your lameness. This is your warning, next year if you pull that shit I'm calling you out.
Peace out,
c
Saturday, March 22, 2008
Things I hate about driving in Dallas
- When entering a freeway you have about 1/4 mile to merge or die. Or be forced to exit again.
- Dallas drivers do not want to let you merge onto the freeway.
- When exiting a freeway, you have about 1/4 mile to merge into the exit only lane.
- Dallas drivers do not want to let you merge into their lane, even though they need to get into the one that you are occupying.
- Dallas drivers do not give the "thank you" wave. Ever.
- The tollway does not warn you that you must have a tolltag at certain booths.
- Dallas sucks.
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
This day in Ceci History: "I'm not your stepping stone"
Lifted from LJ January 30, 2004
I was sitting on the floor in bargain, trying to pyramid, and talking to Ogden and I feel this foot kick my ass. I think that someone just accidentally backed into me or something. No, that's clearly not the case, because it doesn't stop. And Ogden has a look of disbelief/amusement on his face.
"Is someone stepping on me?"
Ogden nods.
"Why is someone stepping on me?"
Ogden shrugs.
I lean over my sholder and yell, "Hey, man! Don't step on me!"
He says, "Oh." and walks away.
WHAT THE HELL?!? No, seriously, what the hell kind of world do we live in when someone will step on you for like 30 damned seconds and doesn't even apologize?
Or even realize that he is stepping on someone's ass? I know he felt something under his foot and against his leg, but he never bothered to look. He had to have known whatever he was stepping/leaning on wasn't his, because he's not in his house. He's in public. Stepping on people.
"Oh."
I was sitting on the floor in bargain, trying to pyramid, and talking to Ogden and I feel this foot kick my ass. I think that someone just accidentally backed into me or something. No, that's clearly not the case, because it doesn't stop. And Ogden has a look of disbelief/amusement on his face.
"Is someone stepping on me?"
Ogden nods.
"Why is someone stepping on me?"
Ogden shrugs.
I lean over my sholder and yell, "Hey, man! Don't step on me!"
He says, "Oh." and walks away.
WHAT THE HELL?!? No, seriously, what the hell kind of world do we live in when someone will step on you for like 30 damned seconds and doesn't even apologize?
Or even realize that he is stepping on someone's ass? I know he felt something under his foot and against his leg, but he never bothered to look. He had to have known whatever he was stepping/leaning on wasn't his, because he's not in his house. He's in public. Stepping on people.
"Oh."
Monday, January 7, 2008
STOP IT!
The next person that fwds me one of those "Why do you park in a driveway and drive on a parkway" bullshit emails will be punched in genitalia to be determined later.
I may start a new series of posts explaining these "hilarious" oxymorons, because really... REALLY.
I may start a new series of posts explaining these "hilarious" oxymorons, because really... REALLY.
Monday, November 12, 2007
Brutal
Oh, man today was rough. Crazy weekend of too much fun (i.e. liquor) and not enough sleep made for one exhausted Ceci... so on that note... Goodnight!
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
Deep Thoughts
I scribbled this on the back of a Liquor Provisioning Form while sitting ARC in CLE a week or two ago.
Things I know:
-There are only two places it is acceptable to ask for a hot tea:
1. Starbucks.
2. England.
-Some people should be aware of the fact that they are no more important than anyone else and abusing people they feel are less than them is unacceptable.
-People who believe they know how things operate usually have the complete opposite idea of how things actually do.
- That feeling you get after stating the obvious... you really don't seem as idiotic as you feel. Multiply by 10.
Things I'm pretty damned sure of:
-Reading "Readers Digest" will automatically decrease your IQ. I've read more intelligent literature scribbled on bathroom stalls.
-People that complain about bad drivers are usually bad drivers themselves.
-Paying attention and following simple signs or instructions is beyond anyone over the age of eight.
-All of life's questions can be answered by lyrics of a Beatles' song. Or a Stones' song.
Things I don't understand:
-People that respond with exaggerated amazement when I say I'm not married. Is that meant to be a compliment?
-People that do not wear sunglasses.
-People that are disrespectful to police officers.
-Why hangovers worsen with age.
Things I know:
-There are only two places it is acceptable to ask for a hot tea:
1. Starbucks.
2. England.
-Some people should be aware of the fact that they are no more important than anyone else and abusing people they feel are less than them is unacceptable.
-People who believe they know how things operate usually have the complete opposite idea of how things actually do.
- That feeling you get after stating the obvious... you really don't seem as idiotic as you feel. Multiply by 10.
Things I'm pretty damned sure of:
-Reading "Readers Digest" will automatically decrease your IQ. I've read more intelligent literature scribbled on bathroom stalls.
-People that complain about bad drivers are usually bad drivers themselves.
-Paying attention and following simple signs or instructions is beyond anyone over the age of eight.
-All of life's questions can be answered by lyrics of a Beatles' song. Or a Stones' song.
Things I don't understand:
-People that respond with exaggerated amazement when I say I'm not married. Is that meant to be a compliment?
-People that do not wear sunglasses.
-People that are disrespectful to police officers.
-Why hangovers worsen with age.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
